December Evenings

The evening is like a match which has been pinched out win damp fingers, somehow slightly smokey,hazy and fizzled. It has been misty all day, and now the mist is hidden by or has evaporated in the wake if eveningfall, leaving behind only smeared fingerprints of dampness on the pavements and windowpanes.

The orange glow of the street lights make fuzzy halos and seem to cast more shadows than light.

Here and there, people have their lights on but curtains open, so you can peep in as you walk last and see their Christmas decorations. I love these little glimpses into other peoples homes. They remind me somehow of windows on an advent calendar. It cheers me too, to see homes with advent wreathed on their doors. 

Jessica is exhausted from nursery and then soft play, and has fallen into a crotchety doze. I should wake her, I should. But I will listen to her snuffly breathing as I sit in a room lit only by the lights on our Christmas tree. The kettle has boiled, and a cup of tea awaits. I hear cars going past outside, the slickness on the road sticking to their wheels. They are going places, busily. My Tuesday is always busy, I get Jessica to nursery for 7:45 then on to an office where I do some freelance admin, and then back to collect her, and then on with the rest of our day. So this little pause is welcome. Sip, reflect, sign, settle. There are cards to be written, gifts to be ordered and wrapped. Gifts to be made. But just for now, my mind which feels like a well shaken snow globe is going to be allowed to come to a whirling rest, just for now.

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One thought on “December Evenings

  1. Love your writing as always. Hope the sadness of your losses dims a little each day. Hope is a good thing to have and the only thing we can really latch onto at times. Hoping for a Merry Christmas for you even in the midst of loss.

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