If you peeked through my window this morning, you might be slightly surprised. It is 9:25 on a Tuesday morning, and I am in bed! I have my favourite nightie on, which is grey patterned with pink roses. I have fluffy pillows to rest against, and the duvet over my legs. The window is open, and I can see a snippet of bright blue sky, and a deliciously cool breeze is drifting in.
I’ve had marmalade on toast and tea, and the next book in the Cazalet Chronicles is at my side (fruit of a library visit yesterday!). All is quiet, except for the gentle murmur of Radio 4. I can’t remember doing this since Jessica was born!
And yet, it is Jessica who is the reason for this! The poor little thing was sick several times in the night. I am pretty sure it was dinner not agreeing with her (she insisted on trying mine as well as hers…I was certain she wouldn’t like thai red noodles! but she loved them!) but she spent a long time awake in the night, and is now catching up on her sleep. So while she is next door, I decided that rather than rush round and do things, I would rest too. I tiptoe in from time to time to check she is ok, and then tiptoe back in here for just a few pages more. I’m going to let her sleep as long as she wants, and hope she feels much better when she wakes up.
Although of course I would much rather she hadn’t been sick, when we had bathed her and changed her, she was cuddled against my chest with her head on my shoulder, arms around my neck, breathing softly against my cheek…and it felt lovely to be there for her. I have memories of being poorly when little, and how better everything felt when I had a cuddle with Mum…it’s lovely but strange to realise I am the Mum now!
Wherever you are today, I hope the sun is shining, and you can be gentle with yourself,